The first question asks you to list the material things that you want. These may not be what other people want, but they are important because everyone aspires to something material - it could be a new car, a new, bigger home, or even just a world cruise.

Question two asks that you think about what you would want to achieve if you had only five to ten years left to live. This focuses the mind and helps you to narrow down your thinking. This is particularly powerful stuff, because it begins to force you to think about your impending demise and, therefore, what you really want to achieve. Having a definite “cut off” date makes you think about time and how to use it to the best of your ability.

Then the method becomes even more focused, asking you to think about what you would most regret failing to do or achieve if you only had 24 hours left to live. This is highly effective, and becomes more personal as you respond to it honestly. Family matters come to the fore, as do questions about your personal legacy.

Essentially what tends to come out of these questions are a series of common goals. For most people the important goal is relationships developing/strengthening relationships particularly spouse and family, then second is friends and community (friends in particular is more and more important) and third is often a desire for spirituality.

There is the old story of the client who came into the financial planner and the financial planner asked "Why are you here?" and their response was "Well we are 55 and at the moment and all we have are blings and toys" and what they meant is that they are 55 and have all the material things in the world, but no real deep spiritual connections.

So spirituality and personal integrity is another key goal that comes out of these questions. Creativity also comes up quite a lot and more importantly we are seeing a lot about the environment, helping to protect the environment etc., and community in a wider sense, often meaning the local community or the wider world, global community.

The other method one could choose to develop goals is to write your own obituary. While this may sound a little morbid, the stark picture that comes when one thinks of one's own death does help to bring focus to goal setting. Write the obituary with a view to writing down what you would like your friends and family to say. This is a powerful method, but perhaps not as effective as the Kinder technique. However, you may gain some added benefit if you combine the two.

While goals are definitely worth writing down, what a lot of people do not realise is that talking them through with someone else is even more effective and can transform your life. It is worthwhile seeking out a friend or partner to help you verbalise the goals that will make your life more fulfilling, although the process works much more effectively if you choose a life coach or a professional that is trained to listen and elicit deep desires. This process can transform you from someone who is lacking in real direction to someone who knows exactly what they want to achieve and is energised by the experience.

To help move you towards taking real action on this issue of goals and how to develop them, take a look at our questionnaire: